After writing a post about the return of paddling in Texas schools, I thought I would search the web for other recent articles on spanking. The following are posts that I came across that are worth reading:
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The French authorites have come to the conculsion that televsion is bad for children. The government is banning a new television channel “BabyFirstTV” produced by News Corp from airing. The channel is geared to children under three, however, experts have recently stated that excessive television viewing can retard normal development. The television channel is airing in the United States and usually runs about $4.99 per month. The producers claim that the channel should be watched by parents and children together.
According to studies, children watch about 1,680 minutes of television per week. An American youth spends about 900 hours in school each year and 1500 hours watching television (I wonder when they do homework). By the time a child is 18 years old, they have seen 200,000 acts of violence on televsion.
I have often used the televsion to “babysit” my own children and I have found the more they watch televsion the more crabby, disrepectful and disobedient they become. I try to keep them busy with other activities including sports, dance and music. Every child should also be assigned some household chores to complete daily. Plus, reading should be done on a daily basis. Unfortunately, many parents find it easier to have their children watch television then to actual make sure that they are raising children to be responsible adults.
My second grade teacher was a paddler. She never paddled the girls, but the boys certain took their share. Soon after that year, paddling was stopped in the Elementary School. Now it seems to be making a comeback. Fort Stockton, Texas, has opted to include paddling as a disciplinary method.
The decision was made in the spring to allow paddling. Public hearings were held and not one person complained. The Fort Stockton School Superinrendent, Roy Mayfield, stated “If a parent is concerned and does not want their child to get corporal punishment, then they need to take the responsibility to make sure that their child knows to behave when they go to school.”
Coporal punishment was allowed in the school district previously, with the parent’s permission. Now a wording change has taken place and the district does not have to ask in advance if the child can be paddled.
It is unfortunate that the school district has to resort to such methods. If parents actually had the discipline how to, this approach might not be necessary. Many parents have no method of discipline in their homes and this reflects in the child’s school behavior as well.
There are days at my house when my three children are constantly arguing. It becomes so frustrating, that eventually I just tell them to solve their own problems. Is this really helping the situation? Probably not!
Sibling fighting can actually be a sign of lack of disciplinary control at home, according to Dr. James Dobson, founder and chairman of Focus on the Family. When children feel that there is no justice or punishment of the wrongdoer tensions can escalate. Older (and bigger) children find it easy to tease and bully younger children. However, younger children can strike back in their own ways.
When fighting among siblings is ignored, the fighting will continue to escalte. Often older children get disciplined while the younger children are constantly “getting away with it.”
Dr. Dobson offered six rules from his own family that can help limit sibling rivalry:
- Children can not make fun of each other in a destructive way. No exceptions.
- Each child should have their own private space. It may be their own room or section of the room. Other children are not allowed to enter without permission and must respect the others’ space.
- Older children are not permitted to tease younger children.
- The younger children can not harass or tease the older children.
- Children should not be required to play with each other when they need alone time or time with friends.
- Parents should mediate any conflict as quickly as possible. Try to show impartiality!
If you want to initiate these rules with your children, make sure that you discuss the rules and the consequences first. This allows children to understand why and when they will be disciplined.
Los Angeles Board Approves Law Holding Parents Responsible for Child’s Behavior
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The Los Angeles County Board of Supervisors approved a new law on Tuesday, August 19, 2008 that would hold children AND their parents accountable for “tagging” or graffiti painted on public property. In 2006, reported were 4,274 reported graffiti incidents and that number was incresed in 2007. The County spends approximately $30 million on graffiti removal and suppression methods.
Discipline begins in the home and many parents are unaware of the damage that their child is causing to public property. Instead of disciplining their children, many parents are hoping that state and local officials will control them. Now parents are going to feel it in their pocketbooks if their child participates in tagging.
The new law will take effect in September and parents will be liable fo civil damages. Parents could pay fines up to $1,000 and could have liens issued against them.
The idea behind the law is to get parents to take responsibility. Too many parents today don’t know how to effectively discipline their children. Unfortunately, in homes where both parents work or in single family homes, parents often do not know where their child is at all times. However, parents must realize that children must be taught respect for property - their own and others. I have seen too many parents not respect public property by littering or stealing and the message they are sending to their children will eventually land them in hot water.
If you want to teach your children respect for property, follow these tips:
- Don’t borrow anything without asking first. This includes property of siblings and parents.
- If you do borrow something, make sure that you take care of it.
- Return the borrowed item in the condition you found it or replace it if you broke it.
- Don’t litter.
- Don’t take public property without asking first.
- Don’t steal. Even a little piece of candy.
A good book to read to your children (it is currently out of print but you may be able to find it on Amazon or eBay) is Those Terrible Toy-Breakers by David McPhail. The book teaches children responbility for their things and what can happen if they are not responsible.
In less than one month, my kids will be starting school again. I will have one in 9th grade, one in 4th grade and a Kindergartener! Now is the time to start preparing for homework time.
My oldest daughter was always one to do her homework immediately when she walked in the door after school. So, I made it the policy that ALL of my kids should do their homework right after school. Guess what? Child number two proved to be a little more difficult. It all depended on her mood.
Setting homework rules must be done with each individual child in mind. My oldest daughter will probably continue to do her homework right after school (or sports practice). My middle child, however, needs some unwind time. This year, I am going to have her sit at the table, eat a healthy snack, talk about her day and then proceed to homework. While this may put time demands on me, I think in the long run it will help her relax and able to focus on the work at hand. Since this is the first year of school for my youngest, we will see what will be the best homework practice for him.
I have times when one of my children (guess which one) refuses to do her homework. Do I discipline her by giving her a time out? Do I yell and threaten? Neither of these have worked well. I have found that denying her any television time sometimes works. If she still refuses, she has to accept the consequences. This usually means staying in at recess and doing her homework. This cures the “I don’t want to do homework” attitude for a least a month! Sometimes the best discipline comes from another source besides the parent. This does NOT mean that you should let the teacher handle all the discipline when it comes to bad school behavior. However, if you explain to the teacher that you have a child who sometimes needs to learn the consequences of their behavior, the teacher will realize that you are trying to work with her and not against her.
I have also found that there needs to be a space for each child for homework. This space should be well organized and stocked with the necessary school supplies. Even if you have a small home or apartment, try and find a quiet corner for homework time.
Do you wonder if you are a good parent? Do you want to know the discipline how to without yelling and screaming?
When my children were born I never thought that the discipline part of parenting would be so hard! Each child is different and each requires different rewards to keep them motivated. It took me quite a while to find techniques for toddler discipline that would also work with teen discipline. I finally discovered how to increase love and harmony in my home and decrease the amount of complaining, whining, arguing and yelling!
It sometimes seemed that other parents had the discipline how to skills that I lacked. I looked into a program called “The G.O.L.D. Standard” that was developed by Rick and Wendy Jensen. Rick and Wendy Jensen are the proud parents of six children and after starting this program they found a transformation had taken place in their home. Using a system of tickets for rewarding good behavior, the Jensen’s found that their children became more accountable and even asked to do extra chores! The system is also used to discipline – tickets are taken away when behavior is not appropriate.
This e-book will instruct about various aspect of discipline including teaching your children to work, motivating children, how to discipline without yelling or nagging, focus on the family and even keeping your marriage strong.
This kind of system is one that I have incorporated into various discipline methods in my home.
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