Discipline How To Blog

I read, with some concern, an oped piece by LaShaun Williams in The New York Times. Ms. Williams makes the case that spanking is a black cultural thing. “Indeed,” she states, “spanking is as much a part of popular black culture as fried chicken and Kool-Aid.” Ms. Williams points out that research shows that black children are more often spanked than are their white counterparts and yet, “black males still lag in academic achievement and dominate prison populations, and black females lead in abortion numbers and have almost three-fourths of their children out of wedlock.” While, this may lead some to the conclusion that spanking is simply not working, Ms. Williams takes another view, believing that black parents have little tolerance for back talking and public disobedience than their white counterparts.

In my experience, I have seen children of many races, creeds and colors raised as obedient, well-rounded children without the need for corporal punishment. On the other hand, I have also known many parents that do use spanking as an occasional punishment.

The real point is that any parent’s goal should be to raise children that are respectful. I have spanked my children on occasion, but now realize that their are many more effective ways to encourage obedience and respect. Unfortunately, there are too many parents today who are overwhelmed when it comes to discipline and often take an easier route by ignoring the problem.

After writing a post about the return of paddling in Texas schools, I thought I would search the web for other recent articles on spanking.  The following are posts that I came across that are worth reading:

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My second grade teacher was a paddler.  She never paddled the girls, but the boys certain took their share.  Soon after that year, paddling was stopped in the Elementary School.  Now it seems to be making a comeback.  Fort Stockton, Texas, has opted to include paddling as a disciplinary method.

The decision was made in the spring to allow paddling.  Public hearings were held and not one person complained.  The Fort Stockton School Superinrendent, Roy Mayfield, stated “If a parent is concerned and does not want their child to get corporal punishment, then they need to take the responsibility to make sure that their child knows to behave when they go to school.”

Coporal punishment was allowed in the school district previously, with the parent’s permission.  Now a wording change has taken place and the district does not have to ask in advance if the child can be paddled. 

It is unfortunate that the school district has to resort to such methods.  If parents actually had the discipline how to, this approach might not be necessary.  Many parents have no method of discipline in their homes and this reflects in the child’s school behavior as well.

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  The Los Angeles County Board of Supervisors approved a new law on Tuesday, August 19, 2008 that would hold children AND their parents accountable for “tagging” or graffiti painted on public property.  In 2006, reported were 4,274 reported graffiti incidents and that number was incresed in 2007.  The County spends approximately $30 million on graffiti removal and suppression methods.

Discipline begins in the home and many parents are unaware of the damage that their child is causing to public property.  Instead of disciplining their children, many parents are hoping that state and local officials will control them.  Now parents are going to feel it in their pocketbooks if their child participates in tagging.

The new law will take effect in September and parents will be liable fo civil damages.  Parents could pay fines up to $1,000 and could have liens issued against them.

The idea behind the law is to get parents to take responsibility.  Too many parents today don’t know how to effectively discipline their children.  Unfortunately, in homes where both parents work or in single family homes, parents often do not know where their child is at all times.  However, parents must realize that children must be taught respect for property - their own and others.  I have seen too many parents not respect public property by littering or stealing and the message they are sending to their children will eventually land them in hot water.  

If you want to teach your children respect for property, follow these tips:

• Don’t borrow anything without asking first.  This includes property of siblings and parents.
• If you do borrow something, make sure that you take care of it.
• Return the borrowed item in the condition you found it or replace it if you broke it.
• Don’t litter.
• Don’t take public property without asking first.
• Don’t steal.  Even a little piece of candy.

A good book to read to your children (it is currently out of print but you may be able to find it on Amazon or eBay) is Those Terrible Toy-Breakers by David McPhail.  The book teaches children responbility for their things and what can happen if they are not responsible.

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